I had one major rule in life growing up: Do not date or marry a Police Officer.
Yup. You read that right. But it isn’t why you are probably thinking.
Growing up my dad was a Police Officer, and was one for 31 years. He knew all of the ins and outs of what it meant to be a Police Officer and the baggage it came with. He saw all the hard times my mom went through and all the things he missed for my sister and I. Of course I noticed my dad wasn’t around as much as the other dads, but it was my normal, I was used to it. And my mom, well she was strong. She never let us see how hard it actually was on her. But they both knew how difficult this life was, and therefore my sister and I had one major rule: we could not date or marry a Police Officer. Well sorry mom and dad, but I always was the rule breaker growing up.
Four years ago I met my best friend, and two years ago he became my better half, my soulmate. And yes, he is a Police Officer. My dad was surprisingly okay with it (mostly because he already loved him!) but he did remind me of his rule…
It was not until about month six or seven when I truly realized why I had that rule.
Growing up I remember only seeing my dad maybe two to three times a week. I had my mom and it was my normal, but my dad was my best friend. I knew how much not seeing him killed me growing up. But here I am. My Officer only has three days a week off; and that’s if we are lucky. Sometimes it is two or one. And just like my dad growing up – it kills me. But instead of pouting about it, I make sure to make those days off count. Make them positive. Make them memorable. Make them worth the days without him.
Holidays. How could I have forgotten about holidays growing up? Thanksgiving? Dad’s leaving early or not coming. Christmas? While other kids opened their presents at 9 AM, we’re still waiting for dad to get off. Birthdays? Forget about it. But here I am. I have yet to spend Thanksgiving, Christmas, or half of the “small holidays” with my Police Officer on the actual day. But I have learned that the day you celebrate the holiday does not matter. For us, Thanksgiving has been on Sunday. Christmas has been the 27th. Birthday dinners happen the next day he’s off. Be patient.
Coming home from school growing up was always like a game. See, my dad worked midnights most of my life, so he was asleep when I was awake and vise versa. So when we came home from school, you better have tip-toed and not made a single sound. I HATED it. But here I am. I am a teacher now and my Police Officer goes to work currently from 2pm-12am; which means our schedules do not match up at all. I wake up every morning, get dressed with a flash light, and pray I don’t make a sound in the kitchen that is too loud. But I do it because I care. I want to make sure he gets that sleep to make sure he is well rested to be the best he can be that next shift. I’ll find time at night to make all the noise I can.
I could go on and on, but the bottom line is I knew deep down what I was getting myself into. I knew what this was going to be like, and I knew it was going to come with difficult situations. I know why my dad made that rule. But here I am.
I am not yet an official Police Wife, but I am a Police Girlfriend and I know someday I will become a Police Wife. I know this life will be hard and I know there will be times I don’t think I’ll be able to handle it. However, I know I’m not alone and I know we’ll work through it all. Together we are a family of LEOWs and we will get through it. It is not always easy, but here WE are.
l Taylor l